This past week, I reached my two-month mark. I had a big weekend ahead of me, I was hosting my college friend (who had graduated last year) in town for a visit.
I was feeling very anxious all week leading up to the visit, especially for the evenings out which would involve drinking. Would I leave early? Skip out completely? There was also the possibility that we would attend a fraternity formal on the Saturday, and I felt torn if it was in my best interest to go or stay home.
I started to take steps to feel more centered and set myself up for success. I stayed in close contact with my parents and worked out a plan for the weekend to include alone time and daytime activities.
The part I most looked forward to was attending the first step meeting on Friday afternoon.
It felt like perfect timing… my mind had been running a little wild and I was about to spend a lot of time with close friends I felt temporarily less close to because I knew they couldn’t relate to how much my relationship with alcohol had changed.
Being at the meeting made me feel stronger to take on the weekend, to be confident in my decision to be sober and free. It was also my two-month mark. I actually had never received a chip before, it just didn’t feel right at the 1-month mark…
That day, I decided that I would stand up in front of the group, even if that meant shining the spotlight on myself. It was such a relief to be surrounded by people who were congratulating me on my sobriety, not because I felt like I deserved a reward, but because it re-affirmed to me that I was not alone.